let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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