windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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