So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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