Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
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He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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