and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
we made out on top of his cat.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
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Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
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Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.