you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.