Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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