Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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