i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
my god I love twenty year old dicks
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
