I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
