Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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