based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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