Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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