I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Randomize