I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
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I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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