from now on my penis is your penis
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
