I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize