I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize