I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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