just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
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