i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
