Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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