some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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