dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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