Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
