yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
