I want to stick my p in your. b.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
50% drunk capacity currently
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
