He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
what day is it and did you see me today?
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Randomize
