i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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