I wish I could punch you in the face.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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