Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize