UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize