I feel like abortions should bother me more
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Threesome in a minivan. New low
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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