I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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