WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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