Already got asked if we're dating
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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