Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Life is so much better after having sex.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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