I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I will be naked everywhere
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
