he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
