My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
