We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
