Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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