Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
