I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
