There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
