All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Randomize
