it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
