I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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