So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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