i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
