No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
