Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
My vagina is officially offended.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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